final post

This will be my last post to this blog.
I have loved having a blog open to the public.  I have "met" friends I would never have met otherwise.  Keeping this blog public, I sacrificed details that are important to us, but that I didn't feel comfortable sharing with those I don't know.  If we know each other and you would know many of those things (names of schools, teachers, activities) because we are friends, I would be happy to invite you to my new blog.  Thank you so much for taking the time to ever stop by here.  A part of me will truly miss having a bit of our lives open to meet new friends.  I would love to see you on Instagram!  Find me @ carindavis

not looking for applause

"If your intentions are to impress people or to get the big applause at the end then you are taking, not giving." -Teitur 

(found here)

To remember to share myself with the intent to give, letting go of what I will receive...that is true magic.  I have been a guitar student off and on (much more off that on unfortunately) for almost 20 years.  When I watched this TedTalk yesterday, my mind went, although this is true for almost any aspect of learning and interest, straight to guitar performances.  I only performed for my family, teachers and recitals.  I immediately felt a difference when other people were in the room (especially teachers and recitals).  My fingers fumbled, my voice weakened and quivered.  That was a large reason that I gave up learning with a teacher.  How limiting to allow a misguided motive change the direction of an opportunity to grow. 

Yesterday in Ellie's guitar lesson I saw the same struggle in her, although to a lesser degree.  I decided that I would make a better effort to play with her as she practices.  We had our first session yesterday. I held her back in a few ways, but in more important ways, we kept each other with a focus of sharing and giving.  Our minds didn't go near any intention to impress.  There was joy in learning for me, and truly if I can focus on a motive to give in all aspects of my life- the work in practice will be so much sweeter.

she still asks me to do her hair

She still asks me to do her hair in the morning and frequently seeks my advice on what she should wear.  She grabs my hand when we walk and tells me a play by play everyday of her time at school.  She leaves a bit of chaos in any room she enters.  Something tells me when she is grown that I will miss that chaos as much as that daily play by play.

plant a tree

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” – Chinese Proverb

When we were at Sundance for Labor Day, Papa pointed out several trees that were growing on the property in difficult places.  He grabbed pots so that we could replant them at home.  Danny planted them tonight and gave us a Family Home Evening lesson deciding who we want to be and what we want to do...and starting NOW.  

Sunday

Ellie was asked to give a talk in church and she wasn't excited.  Not even a little bit excited.  Her topic was THE SACRAMENT.  They have had workshops in our congregation to improve talks and presentations.  One aspect in public speaking that has been emphasized is sharing relatable personal experiences.  That seemed a bit tough given her topic but she (really "we") pulled it together.  

When I was 9 years old my Grandma Davis passed away.  She loved movies, dolls, going out to eat and giving gifts.  Christmas was her favorite time of year.  She died a week before Christmas.  I learned some lessons at this time that are special to me.  

First; Life on earth is fragile and will not last forever

Second; Celebrating & reflecting on her life brings comfort to mine

Third; Feeling gratitude for all that she has done for me helps me to be a better person

If those things are true, and they are, for my Great Grandma, they are surely true for my Savior and the Savior of the world.  

The Sacrament, like my grandma’s funeral, is a time of reflecting, remembering and recommitting.  At my Great Grandmas funeral, it was a reverent peaceful environment. I played guitar and sang with my sisters and cousins.  I spent our time there thinking of her and her life.  If we approach the sacrament in this same way, we will benefit from its blessings.

Elder Holland taught “…every ordinance of the gospel focuses in one way or another on the atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ, and surely that is why this particular ordinance with all its symbolism and imagery comes to us more readily and more repeatedly than any other in our life. It comes in what has been called “the most sacred, the most holy, of all the meetings of the Church.  Perhaps we do not always attach that kind of meaning to our weekly sacramental service.”

  

Then he asked:  How “sacred” and how “holy” [is our worship?]”  

I know that I can make the sacrament more sacred and holy in my life.  I can take this ordinance more seriously, spend time reflecting & repenting.  I am promising to remember Him.  I can do better.

Elder Holland speaking of the night of the Last Supper and the Garden of Gethsemane shared this,

“One request Christ made of his disciples on that night of deep anguish and grief was that they stand by him, stay with him in his hour of sorrow and pain. “Could ye not watch with me one hour?” he asked longingly (Matt. 26:40). I think he asks that again of us, every Sabbath day when the emblems of his life are broken and blessed and passed.

'How great the wisdom and the love

That filled the courts on high

And sent the Savior from above

To suffer, bleed, and die!

Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!'”

After church I congratulated her on talking clearly, looking up from her notes and speaking confidently.  "Mom, I was shaking so much I spilled the sacrament water all over me.  I felt so sick. I didn't stop shaking until it was over!"  Even though we wrote the talk together, she made it hers.  She is surely glad it is over.  Hopefully each time it will get easier and easier.

sleeping beauty

It is 10:37 am and this sleeping beauty is still asleep.

It is going to get a bit ugly around here in a few days at 6:30 am.

ten little toes

My nephew Oliver.
Eleven days old.

eleven

It was her birthday and we were talking about how many years until she was an adult. (That traumatic conversation was NOT my idea!) When I said "7 years" out loud I almost had an anxiety attack!  7 years...that is NOTHING!  We have lived in this home for 10 years...and that moves seems like yesterday.  I am not sure if it was the panic in my eyes (I was trying to disguise the horror) she quickly reminded me...that she is moving in the basement when she is 18 and has elaborate plans for a remodel!  Phew!  Happy 11 year old birthday!

a birthday in DC

A quick trip...celebrating two birthdays... (Danny and Alex)...seeing family...and friends who are just like family...ate amazing food (a small portion of which is pictured)...visited Dumbarton Gardens (LOVED!)...saw our favorite monuments...walked every inch of Georgetown...basically we LOVED every minute of it!

stand still

ISO 800, f 1.4, 1/100: 35mm

Miles above the earth, flying around 600 mph is where I recently found the insight and inspiration to BE STILL.  I was sitting in the middle seat on our flight home from Washington DC.  Danny and I had enjoyed the most wonderful time.  I was anxious to get home, hug our girls, check on Mozart and dig into the crazy schedule of the coming week.  My book was boring me so I turned to the monitor in front of my seat.  After a few games of Solitaire (and frankly not playing very well) I continued to browse the monitor.  I found TEDtalks, which almost always interest me.  I sat in my seat and listened to THIS talk.


"So, in an age of acceleration, nothing can be more exhilarating than going slow. And in an age of distraction, nothing is so luxurious as paying attention. And in an age of constant movement, nothing is so urgent as sitting still."  -Pico Iyer


I have recognized the value of stillness many many times...a heart of peace after attending the temple, a clear head after a yoga session, prayer, enjoying a quiet walk.  One of the stillness ideas that inspired him was an Internet Sabbath- a full day completely unplugging from electronic devices.  As I listened to him, I was re-energized in taking stillness seriously.  Lately I have felt distracted and busy, feeling like my wheels were spinning at maximum speed, yet I was staying still.  In seat 40F I made some quick decisions to put this into practice in my life and not just recognize it as a good idea.  Some ideas I want to experiment with---

Internet Sabbath- I will turn off electronic devices on Sunday, my family is already with me and it is the weekday I already enjoy recognizing as the Sabbath.

Device schedule- 
wake up-until kids leave for school...leave devices alone and use cell phone on a need basis (no internet browsing)
3:00 p.m. (when the girls get home) and later just use my cell phone as needed (texting, communication, etc...)
9:00 p.m.  turn my devices (iPad and phone) in for the night.  If my phone rings or a text dings attend to it...but other than that leave it alone (aka don't waste an hour browsing Instagram, Facebook, Pintrest, etc...)

Morning routine-

wake up, do morning pages (I love these and learned this practice from The Artist's Way and I have let it go lately), prayer and scriptures (study by topic with paper scriptures and journal instead of iPad)

We are going to watch this talk as a family tonight.  What everybody needs as far as creating stillness in their lives is COMPLETELY different.  I look forward to learning what Danny and the girls feel like they can do to apply this for them.  

This morning my scripture study was STILLNESS.  I found Exodus 14:3.  The Lord turned the hearts of the Egyptians against the people of Israel so that they would know that HE is the Lord.  The children of Israel flee with Moses into the wilderness.  They feel trapped, the Egyptians have "marched after them."  The children of Israel lamented to Moses- they would rather live in servitude to the Egyptian than me killed by them!  Moses gave them the reminder I found on the plane last night-

"Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord...The Lord shall fight for you and ye shall hold your peace."

I may not walk across the Red Sea on dry ground BUT I will be led, protected and guided if I like Moses-

fear not

stand STILL

SEE the divinity of the Lord

update:  Danny loved the talk but the other girls weren't sure if they understood it.  They did come up with an idea after we discussed the talk...
Danny- spend more quiet time while driving, find time to step away from his phone
Ellie- create alone time every day
Kate- spend time in the backyard every day
Sophie- spend time reading

Utah Youth Junior Symphony