I know what to do

50mm, 1/200, f2.2 ISO 250

The thoughts rolling through my head-
I want them to lift me,
point me to my goals,
feel my successes,
and have a vision greater than today.

Instead, they are-
shielding me,
protecting me,
keeping me safe.

But safe is boring.
Being unseen is diminishing.
I am ready for more.
Ready for...

"I can"
"I know what to do"
"life is amazing"
"I have beautiful things to offer the world."

I know what to do.

the exit interview

iso400 35mm f2.8 1/160

It was the last day of my mission in the Argentina Rosario Mission.  I sat across the desk from my mission president, Jorge Ventura.  He asked me a question in spanish- "do you know how to find a husband?"  I wasn't sure what he meant or how to respond.  He filled the silence with profound wisdom that I will always be grateful for-

"Hermana Miller, tiene que casarse con alguien que no tiene miedo de trabajar y no tiene miedo de sacrificarse."
Translated: "Sister Miller...marry someone who isn't afraid to work and isn't afraid to sacrifice."

If you know Danny at all, you know that I followed that advice very carefully.  I am so grateful that my girls have him to learn from.  They see him work long days and come home with a smile on his face.  They see him frequently offer to help neighbors and friends.  They see him care of rental property that we have worked hard to obtain.  They have been given the privilege to work there.  They like the money they can earn...but what is even more valuable is the lessons of work and sacrifice they are learning by being at his side.

I will always be grateful for my mission, but especially that wisdom I received on my last day in Argentina.

3 days left

There are only three days left of school-

Kate will do about anything to avoid writing her last English essay of the 8th grade.

CREATE > CONSUME

Photo taken on March 31, 2017.  Danny and I (with Michel + Jimmy) rose early our first morning in Hawaii to watch the sunrise over the ocean.  On our way back to the house (oh how I long to be there every morning!) I caught my shadow as I approached the lawn. Rising early to capture the sunrise over the ocean is one of my favorite examples of living the concept I learned yesterday.

I LOVE the podcast BOLD NEW MOM by Jody Moore.  (I can't find the episode on her blog right now.  It may be the very newest that was posted yesterday and not on the blog yet.)  Today she taught the concept of CREATE MORE THAN YOU CONSUME.  It was EXACTLY what I needed and what I have been praying to understand.  As a stay at home mom with 3 children in 10th, 8th and 5th grades I have a lot of time on my hands.  Time that goes quickly to be sure, but time that is really flexible to fill however I choose.  I have felt really unsettled the last few years...really unsatisfied truly.  I have this desire to be more...produce more...give more...

The concept of CREATE > CONSUME pierced me!  Many of my days are filled with approximately  80% as CONSUMER and 20% as CREATOR.

Some of my CONSUMER choices:

social media: especially IG.  I check IG ALL DAY LONG.  Most of the people I follow are people I know personally.  I check in on them over and over and over.  Photo posting then stories, then look by again in case I missed anything.  Then I head to "explore" anything there...  Facebook.  Honestly.  I hate FB.  I love people that I know on there which has been a great excuse to check in...but I really don't like how I feel when I visit.

audible...LOVE
podcasts...LOVE
shopping...LOVE
eating...LOVE

reading, Netflix, listening to music, magazines, YouTube (brilliant!), TedTalks (YES!), blog reading, NEW (love/hate), movies, TV.

Jody explains...and I am in complete agreement that none of these things are bad.  The trick is to make sure that we CREATE more than we CONSUME.

Some CREATE choices that I love (and don't do enough of):

write, play, art, cook, serve, walk, yoga, bike, swim, travel, photography, hugs, budget, FHE, calligraphy, yard work, cleaning, piano, guitar, blog....

I have a new plan.  I am done living under a rock of consumerism.  Why have I been afraid to be me...to live...to grow?  I am not sure but I am ready to live!